諺語 · a single proverb
養兒方知父母恩
Simplified: 养儿方知父母恩
What does 養兒方知父母恩 (yǎng ér fāng zhī fù mǔ ēn) mean?
養兒方知父母恩 (yǎng ér fāng zhī fù mǔ ēn) is a folk proverb (yànyǔ 諺語). Word for word it reads "only by raising children do you understand the kindness of your parents." In use it means: The full weight of what your parents gave you becomes clear only when you carry the same burden for your own child. You reach for it when you want that idea in one breath, and the Earth note it carries is why we hand it to those born in the Year of the Pig.
Literally: "only by raising children do you understand the kindness of your parents."
The reading
You complained about the rules. You resented the early bedtimes. You thought the worry was excessive. And then you had a child of your own, and every rule made sense, every worry felt too small, and every sacrifice your parents made looked different from the other side. Understanding arrives one generation late.
What kind of proverb it is
Source Common folk proverb, widespread across Chinese culture
Sits beside
外甥打燈籠——照舅（照舊）
wài shēng dǎ dēng long——zhào jiù (zhào jiù)
A pun on 照舅 (illuminating the uncle) and 照舊 (as before).
家有黃金，不如有個好鄰居
jiā yǒu huáng jīn bù rú yǒu gè hǎo lín jū
A good neighbor is worth more than household gold.
龍生龍，鳳生鳳，老鼠生的兒子會打洞
lóng shēng lóng, fèng shēng fèng, lǎo shǔ shēng de ér zi huì dǎ dòng
Children tend to inherit or follow the traits and social standing of their parents.
Keep reading
Return to the Proverb Pond to draw another of the eighty-seven, or hear one read aloud. Read the rest of its chapter in Home, Family & Roots, or follow the years these lines belong to: Year of the Pig, Year of the Rat, and Year of the Ox.
Questions
Is 養兒方知父母恩 a real Chinese proverb?
Yes. 養兒方知父母恩 (yǎng ér fāng zhī fù mǔ ēn) is a folk proverb (yànyǔ 諺語), and it comes from Common folk proverb, widespread across Chinese culture. It is living Chinese heritage, given here with per-character pinyin and its source so you can trust the line, not a phrase invented in English.
How do you pronounce 養兒方知父母恩?
In Mandarin it is yǎng ér fāng zhī fù mǔ ēn. Read the pinyin above each character to follow the tones, or press the speaker beside the calligraphy to hear your browser read 養兒方知父母恩 aloud in Mandarin.